3 Reasons Why Men Need To Talk About Mental Health

Day 9

Let’s turn our attention right now to men and their mental health. Come on, guys, you and I know that we deal with it...but are we talking about it? A lot of you may not be doing so. Stop it.

Yes, stop not talking about it. Stop shutting up. Stop trying to go along with the credo of “suck it up” and all that crap. All you really are doing is hurting yourself while possibly hurting others.

And if you are one of those 1,000 percent testosterone-drinking men, then you really do need to start talking about your mental health.

Why am I so damned determined to get men to talk? Because we don’t want to bother anyone. 

We’re like our heroes John Wayne and whatever other male you’d like to put in here. Some would put a politician, some would put an entrepreneur, some would put a sports hero. Makes no difference. They have issues with their mind, too.

“But what about blah-blah?” a man asks. “He isn’t like me. I’m different than blah-blah. I ain’t scared of nothing.” Sure Bubba, nice try.

If you have a mindset like Bubba, then yeah, you need to join the chatty gang.

A number of years ago, author Terrence Real published “I Don’t Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression.” The book, which is a hell of a read, focuses on men and depression. Seriously, men don’t talk about stuff and they lack safe places to do so. Those safe places are out there. I know. I’ve been to some and, let me tell you, they saved my life.

Mental health issues are not just for women and children. Women who might read that may take offense, but I truly don’t mean any. My goal here is to wake up a lot of men and get them going to deal with those trapped emotions.

Gentlemen, I want to share with you and others three reasons why, I believe, men need to talk about mental health.

1 Men need to offload their emotions

There is a cultural phenomenon taking place. It’s a systemic issue. Men are tornadoes of emotions and energy, swirling around with no direction to go. Emotions sway them to and fro and they love to say no.

No talking about their emotions. No to feeling their emotions. No to getting help.

Yet just look around at society today. Look at men in charge of governments at the federal, state, and local levels. Peer over at men running religious organizations. Stretch your neck and observe the men catering to an individual’s needs so they can get something. 

What moves them to do this? Power, lust, glory, acclaim, and the egotistic need of one-upmanship. It’s disgusting. 

Not one place here to offload your emotions, guys. Yeah, you have the gym, your guns for hunting animals, and that 12-pack of drugs in the glove compartment. Enough. If you are not taking care of your emotional health, then you’re going to have mental health issues. Emotions affect the human nervous system. When it is constantly disturbed, then the inner system gets warped. 

A reset is needed. That’s the clarion call for you, men, to start talking about your emotions and feelings. Don’t look at me like I’m stupid. Have you done any soul work? Are you willing to step into an unknown space and trust men to help you? Think about it.

2 Men need to offload their pain

Stop screwing around, guys. Living in a world of pain simply will not allow you to fully serve your family, friends, and community. You have pain residing in your head, stomach, back, upper legs, and feet. Where do you want to start first?

You don’t know because you haven’t gotten in touch with those pain points. Obviously, you guys may not have any pain in all those places. Maybe you just have some in one place. OK, so what is that pain about? Is it from past trauma? Did something happen years ago that you’ve never told someone else about? Someone you feel safe to share it with now?

My guess is there are thousands of men walking around, carrying a bunch of pain that they’ve never healed from at all. 

When you get the guts to go and start healing, men, then your life will change. A lot of you walk around with the “Messiah complex” raging in you. Look in the mirror and see a man who probably does need to be “saved” from himself.

Find a place to offload your pain. Stop carrying it around with you like a millstone.

3 Men need to upload love for themselves

You can stop offloading stuff for a minute. I want to express this idea: Men don’t love themselves a whole lot. Why men, do you love yourself in a healthy way? I’d say the percentage is slim. 

This is not about how much love you show your family or co-workers. It’s also not about “agape” love. I’m really talking about giving a healthy dose of healthy love to yourself. Your soul aches for it, so why do you deny yourself love?

Because we men have been told about sacrificing for the greater good. We’re also told that if we give allegiance to one human, then we’ll be sufficiently provided for all the time.

Well, what if that man you are pledging allegiance to doesn’t even know what love is at all? Then you will pick up your pitchfork and do that man’s bidding for him. You will not even take into consideration if that man is mentally healthy. (By the way, the same thing can be said for a woman following another woman, too.)

Find the reservoir of love within yourselves, men. It is there. It’s as big as Lake Michigan or the Pacific Ocean. Blue water, cool temperature, and brings your inner rage down to a simmer.

Love yourself, man, in a healthy way.

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When you talk about mental health, then you have to simply do something to help yourself. I really don’t like reading about men not caring for themselves. We have too much of that in today’s world. 

Let us move toward a healthier mindset, guys. We deserve it and so do our loved ones who care about us.